Forgiving is important

It may seem ridiculous the first time you hear it, unbelievable the second time, but forgiving is not for the other person, it’s for you. Once you come to realize just how true that is, you set yourself free.

Choosing to hold a grudge toward someone actually binds your perception of them to you. In essence you stay connected in that negative way. If the person that you feel wronged you is truly remorseful, it may affect them…but even if they don’t feel remorse, even if they choose not to apologize you need to forgive them anyway if freedom and happiness is what you want. Forgiving is important for you, not them.

Once you forgive someone, you’re no longer pulled into negativity every time you see them, or hear their name. How freeing would it feel to not be fazed or affected by them anymore, to still have peace in your heart and move past the hurt, the anger, the sadness?

Bitterness is a prison, forgiving is your key to freedom

Holding a grudge against someone holds you a prisoner. In essence they have power over you, power that you have given them. They actually hold a space in the back of your mind, along with all of the negative emotions you feel. The truth is they probably have no idea how you’re feeling. They may not even give it a thought and here you are stewing with unresolved anger. What for? Would it not be a whole lot healthier to be a forgiving person rather than a resentful one?

If you choose to hold a grudge against perceived wrongs it will negatively affect your present and your future as well. You’ll consciously or unconsciously hold yourself back, protecting yourself so you don’t get hurt again. It changes you, hardens your heart and separates you from your true essence, who you really are; love.

Choose to be forgiving for your health and well-being

According to an article by Tom Valeo on WebMD, forgiveness not only affects your emotions, but it has a tremendous effect on your health. He writes:

“Forgiveness, however, may bring enormous benefits to the person who gives that gift, according to recent research. If you can bring yourself to forgive and forget, you are likely to enjoy lower blood pressure, a stronger immune system, and a drop in the stress hormones circulating in your blood, studies suggest. Back pain, stomach problems, and headaches may disappear. And you’ll reduce the anger, bitterness, resentment, depression, and other negative emotions that accompany the failure to forgive.”

http://www.m.webmd.com/a-to-z-guides/features/forgive-forget#

It’s a lot like holding a hot coal or putting your hand on a hot stove, but expecting it to burn the person that hurt you. Do you see how you are torturing yourself by holding onto that grudge? They are off living their life, and you are continuing to hold the hot coal. Choose to put it down. The act of forgiving may well benefit your health.

Who needs forgiving?

Many times the one we really need to forgive is ourselves. This can be the reason we feel so deeply hurt by another. They may actually inadvertently prod something that is deeply rooted within us. First forgive yourself and realize you have been doing the best you can. Maya Angelou says, ”When you know better you do better.” And when you know better you will do better. So, perhaps being forgiving needs to start at home, in your heart, for you first?

We are truly free when the actions of others no longer affect us. When we come to realize, that we cannot control the emotions, words, or actions of others and when we realize they have nothing to do with us anyway. After all, it’s going to rain. It’s our choice to dance in it or just get wet.

Artist: Ana P Bosque, http://www.flickr.com/photos/streetelephant/

Used under license: http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0/

Empower yourself; take back what you have given away by holding that grudge. What’s done is done. It’s now your choice as to how you let it affect you. Be smart and take care of yourself by deciding to let it go and forgive. After you do, only then will you realize just how much control that situation, that person, those deep rooted issues had on your life. A weight will be lifted off your shoulders and your heavy heart will be light. Choose to be forgiving. See more on forgiving in my post … Forgiveness Creates Happiness

Watch this short video and get inspired to let your anger go.

Get your free 5 min guided meditation/visualization to create Peace & Clarity, mp3 immediate download now. – http://www.loranegordon.com/yourhappinessway/welcome-to-my-page