Accept that resisting what is does not get you what you want.
Acceptance in human psychology is a person’s assent to the reality of a situation, recognizing a process or condition (often a negative or uncomfortable situation) without attempting to change it, protest. The concept is close in meaning to ‘acquiescence’, derived from the Latin ‘acquiēscere’ (to find rest in).
Do you hate your life and want to change it? Wanting a better life, for yourself, for your family is commendable, but you need to figure out who you are first! Do you find yourself dwelling on how “unfair” your life is? Getting angry about situations over which you have no control? What a waste of energy! Having dreams is great, but be sure you are not “howling at the moon” chasing an impossible dream so far out of reach in your heart you know you cannot achieve it. This is a way of not actually going after what you can achieve by putting barriers up and blaming circumstances, other people, even the government, from preventing you reaching your dream.
The perils of ‘If Only’ - refusing to accept that who you are is OK
Another way of sabotaging your efforts to achieve your dreams is what I call the “If only” syndrome. Oh, if only I could lose some weight then men would find me attractive. If only I had gone to Harvard/Yale/Princeton then I would have a great job. If only I lived in a different neighborhood then my life would be so much better.
All of these if only statements are an excuse to not change- a resistance to where you are, your starting point. I’m not saying you cannot move to a better neighborhood, if that is what you want. But to take any road you have to start where you are. You have to accept where you are, and who you are before effecting any kind of change.
I saw this awesome video of an incredibly brave woman demonstrate self-acceptance in a very public way. I wanted to share it with you. Watch it, then reflect on what I ask you afterwards.
Did you understand her message? How did it make you feel? Uncomfortable?
Accept who you are before you change yourself
If you cannot accept yourself, how do you expect others to listen to you? If you want to create change you have to stop fighting so hard against yourself and the things you cannot change. Life happens, sometimes it is not so great. Many times you can do nothing about it. Starting from a place of acceptance brings a sense of peace, leading to renewed energy. Then, you can change those things you can affect directly.
If you accept what you cannot change you become empowered
You can create situations and events you dream about. Accepting situations is not giving up, it is conserving energy for those changes and situations you can affect. As Eckhart Tolle says…
Acceptance looks like a passive state, but in reality it brings something entirely new into this world. That peace, a subtle energy vibration, is consciousness.
Once you tap into consciousness you tap into your own innate power. You start with gratitude for what you have and acceptance that there are some things you cannot alter. You let go of the past which is a dead weight dragging you backwards. you live in the present moment and revel in the now and stop fretting about a future, as yet, unknown. The universe notices, it is listening and it responds. Your positive, happy energy brings more positive good things into your life. Your mind is free from regret, remorse, if only’s and is uncluttered.
Accept responsibility where it exists
If you are struggling with a bad situation partly or wholly of your own making, accept responsibility for your contribution to it. Forgive yourself your mistake. Move forward from that acceptance to change, make reparation if need be. You are now free to make a new choice or decision because you are no longer beating yourself up about the past. Observe your anxiety, acknowledge it, breathe deeply and feel your body’s reaction. By observing you distance yourself from the emotion and it cannot rule your behavior. OK, so you messed up. It does not mean you cannot do better or differently the next time.
If you can learn to accept your world, you can then change it. Listen to my radio broadcast on the power you release when you practice acceptance.
Definetely, you have a gift, a talent, to brilliantly and easily explain complex thought processes and simple behavior. Often times, hitting exactly the right spot.
Love to crossroads with your tweets.
Happy brightdays and regards from Panama City, Panama.
Lorane,
Definetely, you have a gift, a talent, to brilliantly and easily explain complex thought processes and simple behavior. Often times, hitting exactly the right spot.
Love to crossroads with your tweets.
Happy brightdays and regards from Panama City, Panama.
Ariana