What is Your Default Emotion?

 A Default Emotion of Anger



Your default emotion is set to anger. You may sometimes experience slow burning anger that erupts occasionally and shocks you. Or, you may find that you feel constantly irritated by minor matters and are short and sharp with those around you. You might find sleeping at night difficult and suffer from high blood pressure and/or stress.

Typical illnesses for those whose default emotion is anger are stomach upsets, acid-reflux and heartburn. It may well be that what you are truly feeling is another emotion, such as pain, fear, anxiety but you convert it to anger to deal with it. When a society tells you to “be strong” in the face of overwhelming emotion such as the loss of a close one; that despair is often converted to anger- we need to blame someone, get mad at them for our loss. Do you find yourself yelling when you could talk? Do some situations make you want to turn tail and run, but you stand your ground and “fight” even if only with words? Sometimes it is smarter to run, if only to give yourself a breathing space, a moment of calm. It is especially smart to run if the alternative is violence!

Do you get a lot of headaches? Often these are a result of suppressed anger, literally burning into our brains. When your default emotion is set to anger you may perceive danger all around you- but it is not real danger. Somewhere in your past you experienced danger, real or emotional and anger protected you, or you saw it modeled as a protective force. You can push away danger with anger but when it becomes your default emotion you push away good things too.

Do you become a bit defensive when challenged or criticized? This is another sign of an angry default emotion. The feeling that you must defend yourself stems from anger at a perceived threat- it can lead to arguments that seem to come from nowhere. An angry default emotion can be exhausting for the person experiencing it and frightening for those around them.

You CAN change this and set your default emotion to happiness but it takes some learning and undoing of past habits. Some situations may make you feel angry- but the situation itself is not responsible- you can choose to react differently. That traffic jam? Instead of getting mad- try seeing it as an opportunity to listen to the news in full.

Watch my Master Class in Making the Law of Attraction Work for You and you can change that default emotion to happiness.

Useful posts I have written to help you manage your anger are:

Dealing with anger Your Inner Critic The 4 x 4 Breath – learning breathing exercises helps to control anger flourish-31609_1280

A default emotion of resentmentgreen eye

Your default emotion is resentment

You may regularly feel as if others are asking too much of you. Your glass is often half empty rather than half full.
It feels as if everyone else has a great life but not you.
You may even find it difficult to be happy for others success and good fortune.
You find it hard to see your own goals as you are too caught up in watching others lives.

The problem with this default emotion of resentment is that you are not living your own life.
Even when you are ill, it seems as if somebody else is always worse off, demanding attention and taking away from your own need for comfort.
There is an element of martyrdom in a default emotion of resentment.
You are always tending to others but instead of it making you feel good it makes you dislike them.
If you constantly see to others needs you neglect your own and resentment is the natural result.
However, this is your inner self telling you that you are unhappy living like this. Even if you have been brought up
to be dutiful and look after others “unselfishly” it causes a growing knot in your stomach if it is not a path you have chosen for yourself.

You may well find it hard to forgive and forget when someone wrongs you and you hold onto your negative feelings.

Sometimes resentment is a side effect of competitiveness.
Always trying to “keep up with” the more affluent neighbor, the more successful relative, the prettier friend, takes its toll.
Their life is not yours! What are you using as a measure of “success” and feeling resentful when you fall short of this measure?
This does not mean to say that you need to “accept your lot” more that you need to define what it is you want from your own life and stop comparing.
There will always be somebody better off and/or worse off than you.
Resenting others success can also reflect a fear of not achieving success yourself.
Resentment as a default emotion is often mixed with feelings of inadequacy, of not feeling worthy of success.

Resentment is that feeling of being put upon, of never having time for yourself and is not uncommon among parents!
If you have a lot of commitments in your life it does not mean you disappear into them and lose yourself.
Maybe you are a carer and this is hard as somebody is truly dependent on you. You resent them and then you feel guilty, then you resent them for making you feel guilty- a vicious circle.

It does not have to be this way. You CAN change this and set your default emotion to happiness but it takes some learning and undoing of past habits.

The next time you feel a surge of irritation and annoyance that, yet again, you have to do something for somebody else ask yourself the following;
“Do I resent the person, the situation, or my inability to say NO?” Your answer should shed light on your true feelings.

Watch my Master Class in Making the Law of Attraction Work for You and you can change that default emotion to happiness.


Blog posts that can help you to handle feelings of resentment are below:

Choose Forgiveness

Negative Thoughts

Accept and Love Yourself


A Default Emotion of Fear

Your default emotion is set to fear

You are not certain you “deserve” to be happy. eyes-394176_1280

You feel as if you never quite get it right and often seek others reassurance you are on the right track. It often feels as if there is no time for your own dreams as you are busy supporting others’ needs and desires. You worry that you will fail and others will be angry with you.

Typical illnesses that go with a default emotion of fear are persistent low level headaches; skin complaints; palpitations. Fear is a response to the possible damage which might occur. The purpose of fear is to release energy so that we can confront the circumstance but in reality it often paralyzes us. Some convert fear to anger, as a way of taking action. Fear is far more closely linked to our minds than our bodies although we do experience physical symptoms of fear. Do you sometimes get a dry mouth, clammy hands, racing heart when asked to do something new? Your mind can have one of two reactions; it sharpens as you consider the options you have or it spirals into a million imagined disasters and you experience overwhelming anxiety.

Often this is where those nagging critical voices appear in your head, “I’m not good enough, what if I get it wrong, what if I make a fool of myself?” So, when your default emotion is this fearful inadequacy you seek others approval for your actions. You second guess yourself and look for others to decide your fate. This can lead to resentment and anger as you feel you are not in control of your life. When your default emotion is fear it is often obscured by feelings of anxiety which are vague and difficult to grasp. Until you can identify the underlying fear, of failure, of embarrassment, of letting others down; you will not deal with the true root cause of the anxiety.

You CAN change this and set your default emotion to happiness but it takes some learning and undoing of past habits. One exercise is to actually say to yourself, “What is the worst that could happen?” When you shine a light on your fear it often seems small, ridiculous and certainly manageable.

Watch my Master Class in Making the Law of Attraction Work for You and you can change that default emotion to happiness.


Blog posts that can help you to overcome your fear can be found below

End of the world thinking!

Handle stress and learn good breathing techniques

Limiting beliefs

Overcoming low self-esteem flourish-31609_1280

A default emotion of dissatisfactiondisappointment

Your default emotion is dissatisfaction

On the whole you get on with your life. You are not particularly unhappy but not especially happy either.
You often have the sensation that your life is missing something, but cannot put your finger on what is lacking.
You may wonder if this is all there is to life.

You may suffer from irritating illnesses, not easily defined, constant colds, back pain occasionally, tension in your shoulders.
None of these pains warrant hospital but they compromise the quality of your life.

Those around you are pretty much unaware that you feel this dissatisfaction as you tend to keep it to yourself.
However, you may find yourself unenthusiastic about others suggestions, uninspired at work and just watching the clock.
You have occasional days when it seems too much effort to get out of bed and you may find you lose your weekends in doing very little.
Perhaps you are told often by family that you “should be grateful” for your job, your house, your relationships.
This makes you feel guilty about being “ungrateful” and dissatisfied.

When you are doing something everyone else feels is “great fun” and you are “so lucky” you wonder why it does not feel that way for you.

You are not much of a complainer but every now and then you get angry or sad for no apparent reason and have to make a real effort to shake it off.
In your past you may have been clear on what your goals were, but they may have been goals set to please others, or because it was what was expected of you.

Perhaps you squashed some desire or ambition as being unrealistic but still daydream about “If only…”
Your life is not bad, it just is not that brilliant and yet we only have one life, shouldn’t it be a brilliant life?

You are probably loyal to your relationships and may not consider divorce an option, but are not particularly happy in your marriage.
The problem with this default emotion of dissatisfaction is that, over time, it can build into a far more destructive emotion; anger or resentment.
This can lead to an uncharacteristic explosion of emotion which both you and those around you may find difficult to handle.
Sometimes, we take extreme measures when finally pushed by frustration to change our lives.
This can result in relationships that are retrievable, collapsing under the onslaught of repressed emotions finally being expressed.

It does not have to be this way. You CAN change this and set your default emotion to happiness but it takes some learning and undoing of past habits.

Next time you feel that sense of niggling dissatisfaction, ask yourself, “If I could do anything at this point, what would it be?”
Allow yourself to dream, but then write down three things that would need to happen for that dream to come true.
Looking your dissatisfaction squarely in the face can help you challenge your own self- limiting beliefs.

Watch my Master Class in Making the Law of Attraction Work for You and you can change that default emotion to happiness.


Blog posts that can help you to rediscover your purpose and set goals are below:

 Get What You Want

Set Goals

Find Your Purpose


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